My personal ad

I’m a seeker. I’ve got my eyes wide open and I’m looking for my next move.

I love politics, even when they enrage me. I love cities, even when they overwhelm me.

I’m always itching for a change of scenery, and I’m happiest when I’m on the road.

I’m an aspiring yogini, I love the state fair like it’s my long-lost twin sister, I put maple syrup on my eggs and I’ll drop everything to see Lawrence of Arabia in a theater.

What I’m looking for:

Heck, I get along with everyone. But the people I like best are irreverent, intellectually curious, and easygoing.

The word or phrase that best describes my personality

Fill in the blank: _____ is sexy; _____ is sexier.
A slow smile is sexy; laughing out loud is sexier.

If I could be anywhere right now

… I’d be in Chefchaouen, sipping orange juice at a cafe in the central square.

If I was given a million dollars
… I’d retire. Is a million dollars enough to retire on these days?

Five items I can’t live without

1. A library. 2. A coffee shop. 3. My passport. 4. Enough cash to escape. Sounds like a perfect day, right?

The role religion plays in my life

I’m a seeker. I grew up without a spiritual community and I’ve felt that absence throughout my life.

My personal motto or creed

“Have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books written in a foreign language. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them. It is a question of experiencing everything. At present you need to live the question. Perhaps you will gradually, without even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer, some distant day.” – Rainer Maria Rilke

Favorite item of clothing

Red suede peep-toe pumps. If you look up “party shoes” in the dictionary, there would be a picture of these.

And the thing is? I’m not even a peep-toe pumps kind of girl. I spend my days in Danskos or Vans. But I put these on, and I can see the appeal of the girly-girl life.

In my refrigerator one will find…
Good stuff. I eat healthfully AND joyfully. I’ve got salad fixin’s, raspberries, sparkling water, freaky-flavored yogurt (lychee lime! honey rosemary!)… but also some leftover flourless chocolate cake and frozen corn dogs (they’re my dirty little dietary secret).

What I like – or dislike – about what I do for a living

I have a great job, but I’m looking for more than that. I believe in vocation, and I’m still searching for mine.

The type of family I come from
A great one. Parents just celebrated their 40th anniversary. One sister, six years older. We’re all close.

My favorite way to spend a weekend

Yoga in the morning. Brunch with mimosas. A good book in a long bath. Friends over for vino and viands.

5 albums I can’t live without

Nashville Skyline. Graceland. The Historical Conquests of Josh Ritter. The mix tapes my sister makes me. At Folsom Prison.

Movies which spend the most time in my DVD player

Um, does the West Wing box set count?


13 responses to “My personal ad

  1. I keep meaning to read this because I keep seeing the tab and wondering what you put! I love it. I think it probably demonstrates a lot about you and your personality.

    And since I just finished watching some West Wing on my computer, I squeeeeed a little there.

  2. What site are you using? I’ve had an ad on BBWDatefinder for a few years (yeah, I know, still no swain in my life). Here is my profile blurb:

    Thank you for taking the time to check my profile. An always curious woman with many interests, I am seeking a SWM in, hopefully, my general vicinity. Age open though I do prefer younger men. But let’s be reasonable…25 is much too young for me, 40 to 55 seems just about right. Wit and charm are definite turn ons. Bad manners, tattoos, piercings and motorcycles are turn offs. By the way the S in SWM stands for single as in not married. And while I appreciate smiles from everyone, I am seeking someone of my own race. While emails and instant messaging are good ways to get better acquainted before meeting, I’m not interested in pen pals and chat buddies. So, if you have no plans to visit Philadelphia please ignore my profile. One last thing…please have a photo in your profile. I’m a visual creature and the lack of a photo makes me suspect you’re either married or on the lam. So, sorry to say, no pic, no response. If I’ve piqued your interest send me a smile. Good luck to all.

    You know most men just look at the photos and never read the blurb. I guess that’s why I get messages from 25 year olds reading, “I’m young and hung. Interested?” LMAO

  3. This ad is from personals, but that turned out to be a total bust. I got ONE response in, like, four months. (I didn’t pay to join, so I couldn’t initiative contact.)

    I’d really love to know what men look for in the ads. What makes ’em click? What makes ’em write a message? ‘Cause it is definitely not the same things that pique my interest.

  4. I had an ad on bbwpeople meet for a while and tried match previous to that. I had a few dates and one big fat sanity watcher event. (Met a guy for coffee at starbucks and he had to go to his car to get his starbucks card – and never came back!) Never clicked with anyone through the ads.

    Then I joined a chat website and started video chatting with people all over the world. True true you had to be patient with the fettishists (but they are ohh so fun to tease) but I met some really interesting guys and had a lot of fun dates. I dated several guys for a while and had a lot of fun even though no major sparks for about a year and a half. It was pretty amazing to have a real social life for a change. Yes some of it was on line but some of it was real live dates with nice guys. And the experience definitely helped me narrow down what I like and dont etc (ref: aunt fattie on shapely prose)

    Met my soul mate through that site. We chatted via messenger, then cam, then phone – hours and hours and hours. He came to visit and I knew then he was the one. And 2 months later he moved in. I cant believe I asked him, I cant believe he did it Phoenix to Chicago right before winter – neither of us are very spontaneous. Its almost a year since we met and I we both are so grateful we jumped in – turns out the water is fine after all.

    Im a big fan of internet dating – it just took me a while to find the right place to do it. btw the chat program is called paltalk and they have several bbw rooms with some really great people. (and loads of wankers too….)

  5. Jen, I had no results on that site. You’re right, too many wankers. And I’ve met some great people through IM including someone with whom I fell in love. Too bad it didn’t work out.

    Anyhoo, As I said before, most men notice the photo first, that’s what grabs them. Some will take the time to actually read your profile. Maybe you should try the BBW dating sites rather than a general site. And be proactive. Send smiles, see who smiles at you, you can decide then if you want to invest in a paid membership.

  6. I have had a few good experiences with Craigslist, but you have to weed through the losers that are just looking to hook up. I mean there is a lot of weeding.

  7. Jen, what chat site were you using?

  8. Awesome blog! Thanks for the comment on BitchPhD. Thanks for the fat-advocacy!

    BTW – the heroine of John Ireland Bridge was a fat girl. For the win!

  9. kathleen c. dillon

    oh, dear beautiful fat blogger,

    i am an editor and i hope you will forgive my mention that when you list “5 things i cannot live without,” your list only carries 4 items. i am also a Virgo. i ask your forgiveness for mentioning this, i really do. i like all you have to say.

    thank you for listening and kind regards,


  10. I know! But I could only think of four things.

  11. I say I’ve got my eyes wide open, but I haven’t really. And raspberries in the fridge! How extravagant… I only have raspberry-flavored things. Jealous.

  12. What a great ad! I can’t believe you didn’t get a better response. But if you ever get a response from a man who knows where Chefchaouen is, marry him. Morocco is the most beautiful place on earth. :)

  13. Hey there!! I see you have written about Fresh Ayer quite a bit in your blog. I have just started blogging myself on blogspot under Fresh Ayer Clothing. I wanted to link to your blog on my Facebook and Twitter. Give me a call at the store when you have a chance and we can chat about it!!!


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