dateless May

When I started this project, I gave myself a private goal of going on at least one date a month.

Might not sound like much, but I know myself and I knew that it would be a challenge. Then I went and met Writer Guy, and – poof – March and April were taken care of. Now, here we are at the end of May, no date, and damn. I’ve had plans for re-ramping up my search, but I’ve gone and let the month slip by.

So, to keep me honest, some foreshadowing of what is to come in June:

  • New pictures for online personals. My first pictures were a big step for me – just showing my body, front-on, no fooling around with flattering angles to hide my size – but, you know? They aren’t great. I’m all gray and workmanlike. The trouble is, I don’t have a real digital camera (I know, right? I’m so behind the times) AND my BlackBerry’s camera got a little funkified when I had to have the data port replaced a couple of months ago. So I’ve had plans to play dress-up with a couple of friends and take some better pictures, but we haven’t actually gotten around to doing it yet.
  • Once I have new pictures, update my account (or create a new one) on okcupid. Ok, ok, I know, okcupid has a bit of a bad reputation. But, hey, it’s free – and a bunch of my friends use it, so I can forward them the entertainingly creepy messages I sometimes get from overenthusiastic men.
  • I’m also going to try paying for an account (don’t look at me like that. one month! I’m just testing it out) on BBW Personals Plus. I’m still pretty nervous about the whole BBW scene, but a commenter recommended it and, hey, it looks pretty classy. Anyway, if it turns out to be freaky I can always write it off as research and entertain us all with stories.

Got any other suggestions? What can I do to step it up next month?


4 responses to “dateless May

  1. I’m still happy with BBW Personals Plus. I’ve actually met some great guys (though none that have turned into anything more than a few dates but I’m fairly picky). Things have slowed down for me there lately too and I too need some new pictures. I gained some weight this year (re-bound off my last failed diet attempt before I found FA) and I don’t have many pics that reflect my new shape.

    I’ll join you in your June goals. Doesn’t hurt to have a little commenter support right? I’ll see if I can rustle up some new pics too and I’ll check out OKCupid so that I too have another option.

  2. You know, I actually can’t recommend OKCupid enough. My experience there was great — I mean, there’s a lot of losers, sure, but there’s a lot of losers EVERYWHERE. And the guys I DID meet from there were all great — smart, interesting, funny, talented.

    And — I’ll admit my bias here — I met my current boyfriend there, almost a year ago, and it’s by the far the best, most amazing relationship I’ve ever been in. I think OKCupid is the best place, if you’re someone who’s a little bit quirky, and looking to meet someone equally quirky. And I’ve found that dating as a fat girl, quirky is often what you want — guys who are a little off the beaten path are usually the ones who are open to more than the ‘conventional’ idea of beauty.

  3. I just would like to make a recommendation – whatever you do, I would UN-recommend I actually met 3 men from this website and all of them turned out to be failures and disappointments in some way. I am a BBW, but like you, I don’t want to be fetishized… and with one of them, it was THAT creepy.

    I’m actually really thinking about trying the two websites that you mention in this post – okcupid and BBW Personals Plus. Thanks for the recommendations!

    I just stumbled on your blog tonight and I’m reading it and I’m lovin’ it. Rock on with your bad self. :)

  4. Kimocean – definitely! I’d love to have you working on the same goals.

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